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where have you bean?

as we wended our weary way around the principality last july, cyclist editor, pete muir had asked the question that several cyclists have asked before, 'is there a connection between cycling and whisky, and if so, what is it?' i'm paraphrasing of course, because unlike carlton kirby, i do not possess superlative powers of recall. suffice it to say, that is the gist of the question that has punctuated many a pleasant islay bike ride.

given the whisky industry's predilection for obfuscation and exaggeration, i often find myself in a state of dismay that i have been unable to concoct an exotic, if only half-believable answer to that question. when the release notes for one of this weekend's bruichladdich festival bottlings would have us believe that it contains notes of melon, lychees and pineapple, fruits that are rarely even available in the local averagemarket, you can perhaps comprehend the wide vistas of fiction from which i have licence to draw. if only kirkpatrick macmillan had ridden as far as port ellen or port askaig, there would be some credibility in any assertions that a tangible connection between riding a bicycle and a recipe of water, yeast and barley actually exists.

for those who perused the excellent article in last month's copy of cyclist magazine that followed from the bike ride mentioned above, the answer will already be mundanely realised. for those without a copy to hand, allow me to enlighten you with a story that has probably seen too much exposure in these pixels already.

during the first decade of this century, a team from the bottling hall at glenmorangie, owners of ardbeg distillery, participated in a 24 hour mountain-bike event, for which they had a dozen cycle jerseys produced in ardbeg colours. a few weeks later, they arrived on islay to participate in august's annual islay half marathon, clad in those very jerseys. desperate to acquire one for myself, i enquired as to where one might be purchased, only to learn that the counter had stopped at one dozen and there were no more on offer. thus, for the next two years, i pestered the life out of ardbeg's brand manager to produce more, not only for yours truly, but for the velocipedinal public at large.

his initial resistance was worn down by my relentless persistence, and after a couple of years, he caved and had a run of just over three dozen made "just to shut you up". that jersey has not only spawned a number of re-runs in slightly different guise, but resulted in sales well in excess of 200 in the first year, with brian gibb at the cycle jersey selling equally as many from his online shop. and, witnessing ardbeg's success in such matters, cycle jerseys are currently available from ardnahoe, bruichladdich, bowmore and kilchoman, while i have also designed a cycle jersey for islay gin (one that has yet to see the light of day, unfortunately).

the answer to the original question therefore, is that thewashingmachinepost is, effectively, the connection between whisky and cycling, though i still wish i had invented a more sensational fiction. this lack of being able to reply off the cuff to straightforward queries has also stretched to the immediacy of a sunday morning. a few weekends ago, having ridden past kilchoman distillery, the peloton was stopped by two women in a hired car to ask if they were close to the distillery location. kilchoman is sited on a farm just off the singletrack road that forms the perimeter of loch gorm, some 8km from the main road. it is a fairly unlikely location for a whisky distillery and, until reached, features no signposting or apparent likelihood of being reached.

thus, i truly wish i had adopted a quizzical stance and replied "a distillery? out here? are you sure? of course, as a responsible islay resident, i provided them with exacting directions as to how kilchoman distillery might be reached, but perhaps in a parallel universe...

a similar quandary as to a connection between cycling and coffee also exists. i have always put this down to the italian connection, but whether that's the case or otherwise i neither know nor care. yet there is a verifiable assumption that cyclists of all hues and genres are likely to seek out the favoured coffee shops to be found wherever they themselves are found. locally that frequently results in several bicycles, other than our own, being seen in the bike rack outside debbie's cafe in bruichladdich. once the sole outpost of the quality bean, it has been joined by many others, making similar inroads to the likes of costa, starbucks and caffe nero on the mainland.

however, one or two of the coffee hostelries on the princpality are allied to eateries, making it possibly an expensive stop if all you require is a quick shot of caffeine. but as of thursday this past week, all that has changed, with the installation of a costa express self-service machine in bowmore's co-op averagemarket. granted, it is unlikely ever to compete with the likes of debbie's, roy's bookshop, the bothy in port ellen, labels in bowmore or the craigard kitchen in ballygrant, but it does offer greater access; the co-op is open from 7am to 10pm, and makes no demands via sit-in menu.

for those visiting the hallowed isle this summer (or even into winter), and needing either caffeine, warmth or both, just stop in bowmore main street, leave your bicycles safely outside and avail yourself of a made-to-measure coffee.

though presumably unconnected, on the very day that the costa machine was being installed, kilnaughton bay in port ellen paid host to the super-yacht belonging to howard schultz, interim chief executive of starbucks. coincidence?

the truth is out there.

saturday 27 may 2023

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