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l'incroyable monsieur obree
the friday evening ferry arrives at port askaig around 8pm, having left kennacraig at six. friday is the only eve on which the boat uses the northern port for the evening run, a favour normally bestowed upon port ellen in the south, a trip which endures about twenty minutes longer due to the extra sea distance. bowmore is pretty much central from a ferry point of view; it's ten miles from here to port ellen, and eleven to port askaig.
saturday 19th june saw the start of the uk's national bike week, an interruption about which i'm sure i have already made my opinions clear, but also the appointed date for the ardbeg committee tenth anniversary gourmet bike ride. distilleries, including all those on islay, make several thousands of gallons of malt whisky, a product that they have great experience in marketing to an eager but perhaps uninformed public, and their marketing departments employ a variety of methods to achieve this. however, the common denominator has taken its lead from laphroaig's friends of laphroaig, a means of acquiring as many interested names and e-mail addresses as possible to which information and special offers can be despatched at strategic intervals.
ardbeg created their committee at the start of the century; it's free to join, with benefits including special offers, first dibs on new bottlings, and regular copies of the minutes usually detailing unusual and eccentric happenings both on islay and at the distillery. earlier this year, i attended the distillery to hold a meeting with manager mickey heads, and jackie thomson, the visitor centre manager, to finalise details for the gourmet bike ride. my visit co-incided with the release of ardbeg's rollercoaster bottling; at the appointed hour (9am), so many committee members tried to access the webserver, that it effectively fell over (metaphorically speaking) taking it out for the day, and forcing eager prospective purchasers to resort to telephoning the distillery on their one public telephone line. not a good day for a meeting.
current membership of the committee is around 53,000.
my very definition of a gourmet bike ride, an idea brazenly pinched from chris king's in portland, oregon, entailed finishing off the day with dinner in the distillery, after having departed in the morning following breakfast in ardbeg's old kiln cafe. lunch was delivered to ballygrant hall in classy ardbeg black paper gift bags prior to our arrival. to seal the exclusivity of the day, the notion to import an after dinner speaker seemed a good one, and that speaker would almost certainly have to come from the world of cycling. through the auspices of cyclevox, i was able to secure the services of unwitting washingmachinepost progenitor, hour record holder and 4,000m pursuit world champion, graeme obree.
the start of an incredible day's cycling and food commenced with graeme's willingness not only to address us after a fine repast, but to join in the day's ride; surely above and beyond the call of duty? thus, i cycled from bowmore on a fabulous, sunny and cloudless friday evening to meet graeme off the calmac ferry on its arrival at port askaig, outlined against the imposing backdrop of the paps of jura, clearly and impressively visible on our neighbouring isle. graeme had opted to cycle from his domicile in saltcoats, ayrshire, to the ferry terminal in neighbouring ardrossan, taking the boat to arran and cycling across the north of the isle with bob trailer in tow to take the smaller ferry to kintyre, on to kennacraig and ultimately islay.
graeme was riding a self-built steel machine with a substantial length top tube, miniscule stem, and a very heavy red bag stowed in the trailer, and joining two others over for the very same ride, we headed south towards port ellen and their islay accommodation. i had no luggage to speak of, yet it was all i could do at points to keep graeme's back wheel within panting distance of my front. likely why graeme holds cycling records and i don't.
saturday's ride verged on the indescribable, but i'll do my best. hardly anyone comes to islay for the weather, but the 19th bore a cloudless sky all day with just enough of a cooling breeze (non-residents called it a headwind) to prevent it becoming stifling. after a light breakfast at ardbeg, we were joined for the first 9km by mickey heads, il presidenti of velo club d'ardbeg, as we embarked upon our 100km. a gentle rolling pace was made all the more attractive by graeme's willingness to chat to all and sundry about anything and everything, as if we'd all known each other since we were kids. sex, lies and handlebar tape and two wheels on my wagon author, paul howard was over with a circe tandem on review and a stoker to help him ride it. a reasonably paced, mobile conversation.
the ride was punctuated, twice, by the hapless mighty dave t suffering rear wheel punctures, something that has afflicted neither of us for a number of years, and would have to happen on a ride such as this, after having fitted a new rear tyre for the occasion. after our packed lunch, we headed out to the island's atlantic coast on a day so clear, that had the earth's curvature not intervened, we'd easily have seen canada's east coast. as we headed to this impossible view, graeme's rear tyre exhaled its air in sympathy with the now departed might dave, rounding out the bad things always happen in threes prophesy. this circular road around loch gorm leads but to one favoured establishment at which we all stopped for a variety of coffees and perchance a piece of very welcome chocolate cake. paul persuaded graeme to ride stoker on the tandem, and we were treated to back seat no hands on the road twixt debbie's and loch indaal. still the sun shone, and still the sky was cloudless.
the ride almost over, it remained simply to return to our various homesteads or accommodation to shower, change and ready for the evening's face stuffing.
ardbeg may be world famous for its whisky, but the menu and food presented for our delectation in the old kiln cafe was, by common consent, some of the finest seen anywhere in the world, let alone at a malt whisky distillery in a very small village on islay. major brownie points are due to chef kevin hanlon for culinary delights that more than replenished the calories spent during the day. as the evening wound down and we all nursed full stomachs and in some cases ever lightening heads, graeme recounted tales and anecdotes from his championship and record breaking years with a humility and complete lack of affectation that had even the cycling agnostic mrs washingmachinepost, spellbound, wrapt and laughing throughout. a true hero and deserving of every congratulatory testimonial he received from those in attendance.
if amongst those reading there are any responsible for the organisation of cycle club dinners and the like, i suggest you immediately contact matt ward at cyclevox and engage the incredible mr obree for your next gig. the mighty dave t, whose word is not to be taken lightly, was still buzzing this morning, and declared it to be the finest day's cycling and evening celebration he has been fortunate to attend; and dave has attended many such engagements.
graeme obree, we salute you.
major thanks to mickey heads, jackie thomson, hamish torrie, staff at ardbeg distillery, mark unsworth at islay studios, matt ward at cyclevox, rachel and alistair at glenegedale house, debbie, nick and oliver, stuart doyle and john woodrow, and all those who took part in the ride. a day to remember.
and graeme, if you're reading, time to start writing that training manual
posted sunday 20 june 2010
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